As a funeral advocate, I provide support and assistance during the process of planning your funeral. Not everyone feels strongly about their funeral. Often I will hear, ‘I don’t care, I’m not going to be there’. Although there is truth in that, death is a collective experience, and a funeral not only acknowledges the reality of your death, but it also considers the feelings and needs of your family and loved ones. My role as your advocate includes helping you understand your rights and options, guiding you through the various decisions that need to be made, and ensuring that the funeral is planned to be carried out according to your wishes. Essentially, the aim is to assist you to create the funeral you feel will best reflect and celebrate the life you have lived, honour your legacy, and acknowledge the reality of your death.

A thoughtfully planned funeral encourages the expression of grief in a way consistent with your values and cultural beliefs and provides support to mourners. It is important to offer continuity and hope for those who will grieve your death. From a practical perspective, you may choose to arrange a pre-paid funeral or deposit funds into a funeral bond with you bank. Planning also prepares you for a conversation with your family and loved ones to outline how you want your funeral to be. This will be of great value to them and help alleviate any stress they may feel about making choices they may be faced with. If your preferences are not documented, it may be that the executor of your will be required to make decisions which may or may not align with your preferences or those of your family and loved ones.

In addition, as a trained funeral arranger I can also support your family and loved ones as you near death or after you die. Even if you have clearly articulated and documented wishes, these need to be enacted. There are many ethical and client focused funeral providers. As a funeral arranger I can engage with those funeral providers that from my experience have a client focussed and ‘can do’ attitude towards conducting a funeral. Even if you have planned your funeral in advance, your family and loved ones will still need to make stressful decisions in a very short space of time whilst dealing with their grief. If you have not discussed your wishes, this can be even more complex. Unfortunately, this is also the perfect time to be taken advantage of, as they will be at their most vulnerable. If people are just cold-calling or contacting their nearest funeral director, they may be more likely to accept the suggestions offered and to agree to products and services they do not require or cannot afford. As a funeral arranger, I can partner with your family and loved ones and relieve them of much of the burden.

Although legally there does not need to be a funeral at all, grief and bereavement specialist Dr. Alan Wolfet believes that people who take the time and make the effort to create meaningful funeral arrangements when someone loved dies, often end up making new arrangements in their own lives. They remember and reconnect with what is most meaningful to them in their lives, and they strengthen bonds with family members and friends, and can emerged changed, more authentic and purposeful. The best funeral remind us how we should live!

Although not legally required to use a funeral provider, it usually makes good sense to do so, and it is possible to elect to use all or just some of their services. It is possible to have fully family led and organised funerals, and if that’s the preference, I can provide support with the numerous logistical challenges that involves. I will work with your family and friends to create a bespoke funeral that meets everyone’s needs and is within an agreed budget.

There are only three legal requirements in Victoria when someone dies. They must be certified dead by a registered medical practitioner (and a second one if they are to be cremated), the body must be lawfully disposed of, and the Victorian Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages must be notified. Otherwise, there are few rules and regulations and so it is possible to be as traditional or creative as desired.

As a trained funeral celebrant, I can also officiate (if this is required e.g. if it is to be a secular ceremony), and therefore minimise the number of people family and friends have to engage with in these very stressful times. Please click on the Funeral Celebrant tab for more information.